Thursday, October 28, 2010

Boughetto Is My New Favorite Word

Thank you, Kandi. I love her, and she hit the nail on the head with that word. Bourgeois and Ghetto. Phaedra in a nutshell.


I'm sorry. Did The Queen of Yikes fall face first into the '5 for a dollar' bin at Michaels? And ballerinas at a baby shower? Maybe, and I do mean MAYBE, that would be okay if you were an actual ballerina and were having a girl who might grow up to be one.

And that SMILE.
 I've never had a kid, so I'm just asking. When you are in your tenth trimester, do you start bonding with the baby inside you so heavily, that you actually start to look like a toddler? I half expected some soggy Cheerios to slide out of her mouth, half eaten and drool covered.


And why did the Michelin Man poop in her hair? Surely he has better things to do.

In related news, Mariah Carey finally confirmed that she is pregnant. She's going to make this shower look like lunch at the homeless shelter.

14 comments:

Classy Drunk said...

I think Phaedra has country mixed up with southern. She has a little bit of money and now thinks she's a true southern women when really she's just a well off country women. Kind of like the Beverly Hillbillies.

Coleen said...

Haha classy drunk! That makes perfect sense! This last episode every time phaedra came on the screen she looked like raven symone. She kept making all these child like faces.

twunty mcslore said...

THAT'S who I was trying to think of! Raven Simone!

twunty mcslore said...

And I need to understand this whole Country vs. Southern thing. Please enlighten me, Classy. I just assumed that Queen Yikesy never got the Barbie dream home that she wanted and now she's making up for it in spades.

Anonymous said...

Dear Twunty,

I put $50 of my own money into that Baby Shower.

Love,
Dwight

P.S.
Actually Skatt

twunty mcslore said...

does that really mean $5?

Anonymous said...

Dear Twunty,

No, it was $50. 5-0. Get it right. I will not be slandered. Don't make me go and have a facial expression.

Ok. It was $5.

Love,
Dwight

P.S.
Still Skatt

twunty mcslore said...

Well, Dwight. I have here in my hand a check for $500 from the Bank of Make Believe. You may have it after you prove to me that you are really not a ventriloquist's dummy.

Or you could seduce Apollo and put the video on Xtube. Thank you.

Sincerely,
The entire world

Anonymous said...

Dear Twunty,

Could I do both? This face isn't cheap.

I happen to bank at that bank. It's where many of my funds are funded from.

Yours,
Dwight

P.S.
Still Skatt

Robin said...

Too funny Skatt. :-)

I am both country and southern. Ephedra is neither. Yes, we are known for "southern hospitality" and while we do pride ourselves in this, it would be insulting for me to assume that the folks in the rest of the USA don't know how to be hospitable to a guest.

Manners are the cornerstone to everything if you expect people to treat you with any amount of respect no matter where you were brought up. Ephedra has no manners.She might think that Emily Post book gave her manner's but unfortunately for her, you have to be taught manners from birth. This is where her southern roots break down to compost. A real southern Mother would smack her down for the things she says to others. And would have been doing it for as many years she has been on this earth and for as long as it took to make her "learn some manners".Ephedra came by it honest I guess. Her Momma didn't raise no southerner.And, I bet the bank that her kid will be another bastardised version of a true southerner.

Darn..sorry so long...

<3 <3 pssst spaces.

Hugs, Robin

twunty mcslore said...

Ephedra? You, my friend, are a genius. And thank you for the schooling. I will reciprocate with useless anecdotes concerning places I have been only once and things I have seen never.

Did I ever tell you about the time I wrangled pygmies in Germania? Oh, the stories I could tell...

Robin said...

Twunterful, I am not sure that I thought up Ephedra all by myself.I think I saw someone say it before. But as you know it is very possible that I made it up myself because I am truly that clever.. If nobody comes forward claiming credit then that will definately prove that I, Indeed, Made it up myself.

Pygmies? Did you know that the pygmies can ride Gators? And the Gators don't even care? As a matter of fact, you would have never been able to get close to a pygmy while a gator was around..They just jump on their backs and take off. If I didn't know you better I would question the pygmy sory...

love,Robin

twunty mcslore said...

Well, you see, I could have never got near the gators if it wasn't for the pygmies, naturally. That's why I had to wrangle them.

Forgive me, but I must digress. That story you just told reminded me that I am late for a meeting with my charming, if less intelligent mortgage broker at The Bank of Make Believe. I am in the process of buying several huts for my impoverished pygmy friends where I plan on spending my summers learning how to communicate solely through talking out my ass.

Sincerely,
Raven Simone

Anonymous said...

Robin,

So, so true.

That scene in the Limo went above and beyond rude. You don't say shit like that to someone unless your intent is to make them feel LOW. That's exactly what she was going for.

You know at the reunion we'll get a bucket full of: "I didn't mean to imply"/"Sorry if you took it the wrong way." Bitch. Squat little one at that.

Skatt