Saturday, January 17, 2009

Madonna's Bush is Burning

My eyes, that is. It's a liitle early in the morning, so don't click on the link unless you have a strong stomach. This is one of the nude pictures that she posed for in 1979 when she was struggling to make a buck. I'm sure that the forest has been lasered into oblivion by now. That's probably a good thing since I don't think that a razor could handle all the hair balls from this puss.

Free Cootchie Tickles

If you are a lady who lives in the Louisville area and want to help a goober out, answer this ad. Get in the shower, tend to that bush and head on over to Georgie's house, he is ready to satisfy qualified ladies right now! I wonder what constitutes a qualification? Not too stinky? Not too hairy? Not repulsive? I think that all you really need is a vagina, because he is no prize. (love that he is posed in front of a church in the photo above) Check it out;

Friday, January 16, 2009

Spaghetti Cat is DListed's Hot Slut of the Year!

From Michael K, my personal pop culture hero;

The whores of Dlisted have spoken! Spaghetti Cat has been crowned Hot Slut of 2008 with a total of 21,210 votes! Spaghetti Cat only got 116 more votes than Rojo Caliente. This was a death match to the end! Bitches from both campaigns e-mailed me with accusations of voter fraud! There will not be a recount. Spaghetti Cat is the winner. I mean, last year's "Hot Babe of the Year" Phoebe Price has already handed over her crown, sash and royal dildo.
If Spaghetti Cat is unable to fulfill his duties or he runs out of 9 lives, Rojo Caliente will be crowned as his replacement. I will get drunk on Bud at Home Depot in Chelsea tonight to mourn Rojo's loss.... One day my no-heart will go on.....
While I try to heal, let's all congratulate Spaghetti Cat as our 4th Hot Slut of the Year following in the slutsteps of Bai Ling, Harvey Price and international supermodel Phoebe Price.
Thanks to all you skanks for voting! And also thanks to everyone who submitted a Hot Slut request in '08!

Great Heath Ledger Article

Next Thursday marks a year since Heath Ledger died of an accidental drug overdose. It is also the day that the Acadamy Award nominations are released. Entertainment Weekly published an article about him in the words of the people who knew and worked with him. Brought a tear to my eye, if you must know.

Andrew Wyeth Dead at 91

He painted the great 'Christina's World,' above, in 1948 and the 'Helga' series that caused a sensation when they were released because of his rumored affair with the subject. He died in his sleep last night in his home outside of Philadelphia.

Quote of the day

Part of the debtor mentality is a constant, frantically suppressed undercurrent of terror. We have one of the highest debt-to-income ratios in the world, and apparently most of us are two paychecks from the street. Those in power -- governments, employers -- exploit this, to great effect. Frightened people are obedient -- not just physically, but intellectually and emotionally. If your employer tells you to work overtime, and you know that refusing could jeopardize everything you have, then not only do you work the overtime, but you convince yourself that you're doing it voluntarily, out of loyalty to the company; because the alternative is to acknowledge that you are living in terror. Before you know it, you've persuaded yourself that you have a profound emotional attachment to some vast multinational corporation: you've indentured not just your working hours, but your entire thought process. The only people who are capable of either unfettered action or unfettered thought are those who -- either because they're heroically brave, or because they're insane, or because they know themselves to be safe -- are free from fear.

Child Pornography Laws Weren't Created for This

Every teen with a camera phone seems to use it to send provacative pictures to friends and crushes on a regular basis. Nothing new, right? Hell, I'm hardly a teen and I've done it. Now some nosey Nellies have gotten their panties in a bunch and are trying to sue some kids for having naughty pics on their phones. Using child pornography laws. Against children. Wtf?

Read it here;

Queer Abs for the Straight Flab

You know you want it. Don't delay, it's Abulous!

BBUK= Humiliation 101

"God, I hope my dignity's in here somewhere."
Poor Verne Troyer. They dressed him up like Boo Boo on the British version of Big Brother. Next they'll probably stuff him into a replica of R2D2 or put him in a babby buggy on the street to scare old ladies and small children. I hope it's worth it, Verne. Those motorized scooters must cost a fortune.

Boy George Sentenced to 15 Months in Prison

Well, doesn't this just suck. I have only met him once, and that was back in 1987 when he was allegedly doing coke. It was in a London nightclub and he held court from a velvet banquette near the front. He ignored everyone except his close friends and smoked cigarettes while running a constant catty dialogue with those around him. He was beautiful, impeccably made up, and much thinner then. I am so sad to see him like this. We idolized him in college and to see him look this terrible is heart breaking. He starts his sentence next week, I beleive and I hope he uses this time to turn his life around.

Ann Coulter is the Devil

See for yourself.

Farewell, Assclown

Did anybody watch Bush's buh-bye speech last night? If you didn't, you did not miss anything. It was a lot of jabber-jawing nonsense that any delusional Republican 6th grader could have written. It was pathetic. Lots of lies and poorly done spin control. There was no clapping until the very end but it seemed to me like he paused a few times as if he were expecting a standing ovation.

Go back to Texas, Dubya, and take all the bad Karma of the last eight years with you. You will not be missed.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Plane Crashes Into the Hudson

Not again. Say a prayer because as I write this people are fighting for their lives after their plane crashed into the waters of the Hudson river. The good news is that every boat in the area immediately responded to the site. It looks like a small commercial airliner and it is sitting on top of the water right now.
UPDATE: The USAirways Airbus320 on its way to North Carolina hit a flock of geese and the amazing pilot managed such a soft landing that the ferries that got there right after the crash were able to save everybody! Some were on the inflated slide and others had managed to crawl on top of the wing before it sank. A totally fabulous effort by everyone. Yay, something turns out to have a happy ending for a change!

Madonna is Going to Love This

At least she finally let Lourdes wax off her moustache and unibrow in real life.

"On Earth Two Hundred years Ago, I Was a Prince With Power Over Millions!"

In honor of Ricardo Montalban's death my boyfriend read me quotes from "The Wrath of Khan" last night. Google it, you will die laughing at the dialogue.

So, sadness once again. This guy made my saturday nights babysitting fly by with "Fantasy Island" which always followed "The Love Boat." Put me right to sleep. It was all guest stars all night, and in the beginning, stars actually wanted to be on it. I also loved his Corinthian leather commercials for the Chryler Cordoba. Never knew anyone who actually drove one, though.

By the way, I think he was 88 and I think he died of a broken heart. His wife of two hundred years passed away last year and he just couldn't stand to be without her.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Celebrity Autobiography

Comedians like Rachel Dratch and Michael Urie get together at an unnamed club on NYC's upper west side and read aloud from some of the ridiculous celebrity drivel that you can find at your local book store.

82 Foot Buzzer Beater

I don't think that anyone's going to beat this one for a while. Oh wait. Lebron will find a way.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Regular Everyday Normal Crew

Jon Lajoie's take on rappers and their ridiculously moneyed, big ego entourages. Good schtick, but I don't know how much longer he can milk this without becoming a one-note performer. Enjoy!

Right Back Atcha, Buddy

Scary faced actor Mickey Rourke won a Golden Globe last night for his work in The Wrestler and called director Darren Aronofsky a tough sunofabitch, hence the finger salute. Don't you love live TV?

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Steelers defeat Chargers 35-24

I am a happy, happy girl. What a game! I am too excited to make too much sense right now, but we beat the Chargers and it is on to the Ravens. I will be wearing my pink Polamalu jersey until then, even if it stinks so bad that homeless people run from the smell! Yay, Steelers. And now, sleepy time.

THe Art of Xan

Alexandra Underhill is an amazing costume designer, sculpter and stilt walker. She is a local artist here in Cleveland who has designed for dance and opera companies, and graduated from the Cleveland Institute of Art with honors. Check her out, she is fabulous.

And visit the website for the book she did with Shannon Okey on DIY fashion:

Oh, How I've Missed You, Joel.

The Soup is back!

It's a Wet Day in Nashville

And I don't mean from the rain. Tears are flowing after 3 turnovers and a Baltimore defense that just would not quit. The hit Ray Lewis put on Ahmard Hall could be heard all the way to Kentucky and the blitzes had Kerry Collins running scared. To top it all off, the Ravens won on a Matt Stover field goal. He is the last player on the team who came over from Cleveland when Art Model broke Browns fans hearts and insured his spot in hell by taking the team to Baltimore.

We shall see after today's Steelers-Chargers match-up, if it is going to be an AFC North championship game. Who do you root for if you're a Browns fan? I would have to say the Steelers. As much as there is a rivalry between the Steelers and the Browns, there is nothing approaching the hate Clevelanders feel for the Ravens.