This isn't just a problem for straight guys that want to get laid, beleive me. We used to hang out at the Paradise Garage in New York all the time in the late 80s and I couldn't begin to count how many times I got grinded into a pulp sandwich by horny guys who thought it was sexy to lead with the crotch and ask questions later. Tobie and I would watch out for each other and if it got too intense for one of us, the other would step in and together we'd drag ourselves over to the bar with oranges and cheese curls in huge bowls and chow down. These were the days of X popping and for some reason orange food and water was all you craved. It didn't even matter that they didn't serve alcohol but they sure did serve up heaping platters of gorgeous boys from all over Manhattan. Those were the days.
Here's Flight of the Conchords:
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