I will provide names since I don't expect any of you to be as obsessed as I am. First up- the obligatory David Beckham.
Don't worry. It gets naked-er.
I may be one of the few people completely turned off by his Minnie Mouse voice but I gotta respect a guy who gets into a tub with a Bear. Maybe he likes some extra meat once in a while. He ain't gettin' it from Victoria!
Chelsea's John Terry celebrates a win by showing us his knickers. More athletes need to do this.
Stephen Appiah. More athletes need to walk around with no shirts on. Or pants.
In honor of my Spartacus obsession, I give you Italians in their mutande.
Nicklas Bendtner having a moment.
Jack Wilshere has a cute pug. He doesn't have to get naked.
Anelka. In my next life I want to be a man oiler. I will forfeit my salary if I can get paid in trade.
Cristiano Ronaldo. If he doesn't SCREAM pendejo, I don't know who does. Total Chode who plucks more than I do.
Chelsea's Drogba. That right there, my friends, is a beautiful man.
Wayne Rooney. If you like them hairy, stupid and spectacularly gifted, he's the guy for you.
Torres. In the UK they call him 'Freckles.' Insanely cute.
Ashley Cole. Was Married to Cheryl Cole, one of the prettiest girls in all of England. Cheated on her regularly. Recently accidentally shot a club intern with a BB gun in the locker room.Spectacularly DUMB.
Last but not least, Tim Howard. He's the only American in the group and he didn't let his autism stop him from being one of the best goalies in the world.