Creepy Old Man Magnet

I can't remember when it started but I've always seemed to be the perfect type for leering older men. I could be in Antarctica studying penguin mating habits and some weird old professor would probably track me down and make my life miserable.

Anyway, I'm standing in our local upscale grocery's check out line when I notice that behind me there's some dude 20 years older than god giving me this really wide pervy smile. He's fit, he's wearing jeans and a sweater probably designed to make him appear hip with the younger cats out there, but still obviously an older douchebag.

So he leans into me with that Polident toothiness and whispers, "I really like your hair."

I say thanks and for a moment contemplate leaving it at that but he continues to eye me like a complete fruitcake so I grab a few strands and I say, "You know, it's getting pretty long, doncha think?" Then I look him right in the eye, lean in and whisper, "And they say all lesbians have short hair, hee hee."

He backed away immediately.