Ho, Ho, Hos

I don't post very often anymore about the Housewives of Wherever, or as I like to call these shows, Day of the Locusts Part II, but I saw this photo and just had to put it up.

What is that body language between Lisa and Kyle about? Lisa looks like she thinks Kyle's hideousness might rub off on her. Her face is a mask of barely concealed disgust! Oh, those rich Brits. When they aren't being bawdy and facetious, they seem to be sitting on piles of repressed feelings. What do you think? Is this the end of the line for this friendship, and what in Paris Hell is Kyle wearing? Her niece's hand me downs, or is it Taylor's skin?

Lindsay Lohan In Playboy

I don't know, you guys. Not only is it way too literally derivitive, but it's freaking bland. Girl has no soul behind her eyes. I thought I'd never say this but Pam Anderson has more soul, as does any decent drag queen, which she resembles in a boobs-photoshopped-onto-a-Drag Race contestant kind of way.

A couple more after the jump.

TGIF With Megan Mullally's School For Actresses

There's nothing like starting the weekend with something completely ridiculous, yet true!

Home for Actresses from Megan Mullally

Chloe Seven-KNEE's Closet

I think she's cute. Pretentiously cute, but cute nonetheless. I like that she can laugh at herself. Also, I never noticed that she has this little vocal tick where she kinda 'tsks' after a sentence. Does Drew do that in his parodies? Anyway, she would make a perfect flapper and I think that she should be playing Daisy in The Great Gatsby, not Carey Mulligan. 


Perhaps Carey is an excellent actress but she just doesn't have IT, you know? Chloe has IT. I kinda love her in a healthy girl crush kind of way.

At Home with Chloë Sevigny: Part 1 from Opening Ceremony on Vimeo.

Response To Rick Perry

Vote for THIS guy.



It was in response to this incredibly unpopular Rick Perry video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PAJNntoRgA
Gee, I wonder why people don't like it. Hmmmm.

The BEAUTY

Can you imagine an entire movie filmed like this? I would pass out, right after I started using pot again.

TimeScapes 4K from Tom Lowe on Vimeo.

Congrats To Tiger On Finally Winning A Tournament

Finally, at the Chevron World Championship in Thousand Oaks yesterday, he didn't choke. It only took two years for him to get his mojo back, and by mojo I mean a tramp named Maureen that works at Howard Johnsons. All kidding aside, I was almost as relieved as Tiger because a winning Tiger is good for the sport. It's a fact. The ratings go up, more people are interested in the sport and it will help this country take advantage of the exploding market in Asia. 

On a lighter side, here's a guy yelling something after Tiger's last tee shot on 18 yesterday.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dJy_fV2Wzg
It was a Redditor, of course. 

Sometimes More Is Too Much

On our way home from La Dolce Vita in Little Italy (their Fettucini Fellini is to die for), I made Mr. McSlore stop the car so I could get a picture of this enormous tree in front of one of the mansions here in Cleveland Heights. It's kind of a mess, right? It completely dwarfs the house. It's so showy that you can see it from around the corner. I could see it from Murray Hill, practically. 


Note also that they decided that renting a cherry picker was okay for one damn tree but put absolutely nothing on the house itself. There is no balance. It's like the only thing they care about is having the biggest damn tree around. It's like the Anna Nicole of trees, sloppy and hard to miss.

Mirror, Mirror On The Wall, Who's The Vilest One Of All?

Whose voice shrinks men's balls up into their body cavities? Who makes sweeping generalizations of all men, including gay ones? Who miraculously still has a job yet has never been successful at it? Who tells women to amp up the titties while dumbing themselves down, all for the right RICH guy, of course?


Why, it's Batty Canker, of course!

Thank you, thank you to the geniuses over at Vulture. Their NY magazine recaps and TV reporting are my favorites by far.

What It's Like To Be The Puck

Just don't get too drunk first!

RIP Patrice O'Neal

One of the truly great comics of our time is gone. He died of complications following the stroke he suffered in October. He will be missed.


Here's his best bit. If you know of any others, please share the links.

Ridickulous Seems Like A Cool Guy

If you watched The Real Housewives of Atlanta, you know that I referring to the stripper that is so big that he can fellate himself. Is that a word, fellate? Anyway, he can suck his own dick. 


I just love how NeNe acts like she's a lady when she sees him. Puh-lease! You know she only acted disgusted because she didn't think of it first. What a nasty old bitter bitch she has become. I have never seen a glummer cunt.


And since you are all wondering.....Ridickulous naked after the jump! Proceed with caution.

Joel McHale on Conan

He really does hate those Kunts, doesn't he?
And we agreed that if Joel says it, it doesn't count as an actual KKK post, right? Good, because he's funny as Hell, and I still love Conan even though I never seem to be awake or sober enough to hit the DVR when he's on.

The Hunger Games Trailer

It looks good, and guaranteed to be upsetting. Only one comes out alive. Can we throw Taylor in there too?

Kartrashian SNL Skit

Please let this mark the end of their rein of terror on the E! network. Such losers! And I blame every single one of you that watch this trite glorification of superficial fame grabbing and phony familial homey-ness. 


Remember, this is a girl that is not only famous for getting peed on, but she stole six figures from Ray J's own Mother. And that voice! It is so bland, so devoid of anything remotely resembling character or personality that it makes me want to stick knitting needles into my ears! Oh, and let's not forget that their so-called collections of perfumes, handbags and clothing are complete rip-offs of other designers. They all suck, and this is the first and last post I will ever do about these leeches on society, which I wouldn't have done in the first place if Kristen Wiig wasn't such a genius.