Mourning The Dove

We have a young hawk that practically lives in our yard. About a week ago, I went out to tear up some stale bread for the birds when I heard a loud flapping in the juniper tree above me. It was a hawk whom I disturbed as he was perusing the smorgasbord of feathered delicacies in our hedge. Well, he came back. A lot.


This morning there was a pleasant site out by the back bird feeder. Our mangy squirrel was scarfing up some dropped birdseed alongside a trio of Mourning Doves. I went back to my tea and went about my business until...........until...

Hawk 1, birds 0.


What a mess he left me! Watch him poop the damn bones out on the porch too.

Caption The Housewife, Boo Hoo Skidoo Edition

By now you have heard that DC was cancelled, due in no small part by Bravo not wanting to worry about lawsuits every time someone called them party crashers. The entire series was a freaking bore anyway, so good riddance!

TGIF With A Good Little Soldier

NOT.

Sorry I forgot to put this up yesterday. I was too busy being blonde.

Mob Wives

I saw this on Stoopid Housewives site and had to share:

Mob Wives |Full Episodes |Reality Shows |TV Shows
I don't know about you but I'm going to at least give it a shot. I'll watch the first episode just to count how many times they bleep these feral hos and their trashy mouths! EPIC.


Premieres April 17th on VH1, the epicenter of crap television!

Freestyle Play by Play Arrest

Dude sounds like he has Tourrettes or something or his mouth is cursed like the ballet slippers in The Red Shoes and he has to rap until he dies. Or it's the PCP.

He Likes His Women Dead

Dead girls don't put up a fight, they don't say no and you needn't take them out to dinner or worry about winning them over with your sparkling personality.

What you do need to worry about is where to hide those pesky bodies. Especially if you don't eat them like Jeffrey Dahlmer did. So, Anthony Sowell buried them in the back yard, left them to rot in the attic and wrapped their skulls in paper in the basement. That means that he lived in close proximity to the death he created on a constant basis. Maybe he liked it that way, I'm not sure that I want to know.

What will probaby happen is that people from his childhood will pop up and have things to say about their impressions of him, what he was like with girls and if he started out torturing animals. You have to take it with a grain of salt since some people will do anything for their five seconds on the evening news.

This is so depressing but isn't it fitting that the police caught him on Halloween? And just a few days before that he was up to his usual shit, getting a girl drunk in his house and attacking her with the intent to rape and kill. Thank God that one managed to get away.

The saddest part? All those families visiting the missing person's station that they set up down the street, hoping that one of the bodies is their missing loved one, just for some answers and maybe some closure.

By the way, we are up to ten bodies now. All this just a few miles from our home. Read the sex offender list from your neighborhood, people. There are plenty of sickos out there and they are not just in Ohio, though we do seem more adept than other states at creating them.

Mouse Abuse

It's not okay to pinch waitress's butts anymore? When did that happen?
Surreal.

The Chandra Levy Case May Finally Come to an End

Remember about eight years ago when all the media talked about was Gary Condit and Chandra Levy? Did he kill her when she threatened to expose their affair? Or was it an attack by a psycho who follows women joggers in the park? Turns out to be the latter. Police have a man, Ingmar Guandique, who is already in custody for attacking two other female joggers. It turns out that his DNA matches some of the evidence the police found. The authorities aren't being any more specific than that, probably because it took them so long and they don't want another media feeding frenzy. Last time the media cost Gary Condit the Primary in California, though he did win money from three news outlets in court, and sadly, 9-11 happened and wiped the case off of the front pages forever.

I hope this gives her parents closure and they get what they want, a life sentence for her killer instead of the death penalty. Her father says that he wants the guy to suffer for life.

O J Gets Sentenced, Cries and Pleads Like a Little Bitch

Someone isn't very apologetic.
Kudos to Judge Glass, who I have heard nothing but good things about. I've heard conflicting reports about how many years in prison he is going to get, but at least 9 years before he's eligible for parole, a maximum of 33. I'll correct it if I'm wrong. Oh, and he's not getting bail pending an appeal. Nice.

Someone's Playing the Crying Game Today

The news is making me nostalgic this morning. As for this story, not in a good way. In sad court related news, Boy George was found guilty of false imprisonment of male escort Auden Carlsen and will no doubt face jail time. I know that he's a poofter but I think he's strong enough to handle it. I'd be super surprised to learn that their jails are anywhere near as violent as ours, so he'll probably be put on kitchen duty and complain of boredom and the crappy food and the lack of prostitutes.

I think this is all just a kinky situation gone wrong and that Norwegian ecsort is going to try to take his money in a civil suit. Just you wait and see.

Drag Queen Jewel Heist!

What a fabulous way to start my day. Just the thought of this amazing crime brings back memories of watching old John Waters movies with my friends and Divine with a gun in Female Trouble. (I couldn't find a decent picture or I would have posted it)

Anyway, CNN is reporting that 3 or 4 men, 2 of whom were dressed in drag, robbed Harry Winston in Paris of over $100 million in jewels. The Champs Elysees store was right around the corner from the police station. Their drag must have been pretty damn good because the store employees mistook them for clients when they first walked in.

I know that queens like their jewels, but damn! Someone make a movie about this immediately.