Trying To Make The Winter Fly By

Ah, yes. Winter in Northeast Ohio. It lasts so long and is so dreary that people in their 30s fly south for those awful months like so many bloated Goldfinches. Me, I choose to stay here. I like a little dark with my light, a little salt with my sweet and a little depression with my joy. I still try to combat the blues, though, mostly by getting off my ass and doing things and going places, like Pittsburgh.


Pittsburgh, you say? How in Saint Morgan Fairchild Hell is that getting away from it all? 


Well, let me start with our charming hotel. It's called The Priory and it's a beautiful, restored Parsonage attached to a small sanctuary that wealthy Pennsylvanians book for wedding receptions and the like. I think it would be great for a Halloween party. (I hate weddings. They just seem like a giant exercise in Bride's magazine show-offery and coupledom mutual masturbation, BLECH)

The hotel's ceilings are high, the lighting fixtures are ancient and the atmosphere is one of naughty gaiety. We arrived Saturday night to a crush of revelers in the lobby enjoying a beer or ten before heading off to the wedding reception to listen to slurred speeches full of forced hilarity and watch Auntie dance with her favorite 'nephew.'


We steered clear of that mess and strolled down the hall to our room. There were all manner of lovely artifacts placed here and there and it took all my powers of self control not to steal this hat box that was just sitting on an antique table.

Alas, my backpack was too small. (makes mental note to hit Gander Mountain on the way home)


Get a load of this lovely mini-priory! I can just picture some pious, but perpetually bored man of the cloth wiling away the hours with some brandy and glue.

Okay, maybe not so mini, since it was four feet tall, and not so gluey since I spy a clamp. What are you going to do? Brandy doesn't make a monk so handy. Handsy, yes.


This is the bar. Surprisingly enough, we spent no time there. The Bota beckoned (or was it Cardinal Zin?) and I was still a bit nauseous from my new glasses. I hate them. Lasik, here I come. 

Yes, that is an old bank safe acting as the bar storage. Somebody doesn't trust their employees....
Or the guests. Hmm.


The next day we attended the Penguins' hockey game where the boys in Black & Gold prevailed over the Capitals and their much diminished prowess, and then we headed back across the 9th Street Bridge when we were overtaken by a tall ginger with giant mittens. I called him Hellboy O'Brien. Hubby trumped me by calling him Hillboy O'Brien. Teehee, inbred jokes.

As much as I love Pittsburgh, I have to admit that it does give off that not-so-faint whiff of third generation first-cousin marriages, which is where we come full circle, or should I say 'circular.'

Which is what passes for curtains 'round here.


What, no comics? Those are so much classier.

Best of Wipeout 4, Winter Shows No Mercy!

If you don't cough up a lung laughing at this shit, you are un-American!

Eff You, Snow Miser!

He must really, really like us this year. He just won't leave! It seems to be never ending at this point. I took the above picture back on March 5th. Guess what? That snowpocalyptic ski hill from behind Target in University Heights? It's STILL THERE. It has shrunk maybe six feet all the way around but it's still there. God knows how many other shopping carts are hidden in there, and there's an elementary school nearby so I won't be surprised if they pull an entire Boy Scout troupe of frozen snot nosed third graders out of the pile in May. 


And yes, I believe that the snow mountain will still be there in May. Hell, it might still be there in JUNE if this year is anything to go by.

Wonderland

So, I woke up this morning to discover that the snow fairy had come back for another visit! The ground is all sparkly and shiny like angel's wings and my pups scamper and frolic in it like Thumper and Bambi when they were in the throes of first love. It's just the cutest thing ever until you realize IT'S ALMOST APRIL AND YOU WANT TO KILL SOMEONE.


Toodles!

When's It Going To End??

Finally, an ad campaign I can get behind.

This Is Where I Live, Folks

Strangely beautiful.

Puppy Flashback

This is from last winter when my voice was all messed up from the flu and me and Mr. McSlore decided to do some dog mushing down the street. It was super snowy, I may have had a glass of wine or two in me and the dogs mushed me into a snowdrift. Expect another one in a month or two. Yay, puppies!

The Dogs Are Too Small

We tried to get a good sled ride by mushing our two under 50 lb dogs. Not so successful. Sorry it's so fuzzy. I'm a novice, as are the puppies since they rode me right into a snowdrift. Wooooo!!!! clunk.

Epic Snowball Fight Today

If you live close to the University of Wisconson, Madison, try to stay indoors today. The students who live in dorms are going to make a stab at breaking the record for the largest snowball fight. The present record is 3,700 and took place at Michigan Technological University last year. The difference this year is that the temperature is in the single digits so does that mean ice balls instead of snow balls? Are hand warmers illegal? Because if you melt the snow with them it will form hard little ice balls that could be brutal. I hope I'm not giving anyone any ideas but someone is bound to get hurt which explains the presence of police and emergency medical techs. This better be up on Youtube later today. They estimate, from the events Facebook page (you knew that was coming, right?) that there will be 4,000 people joining in. Wish I was there.

Red Wings Beat Blackawks 6-3

The best thing about this game was that it was high scoring and I watched it in HD. Last years was better on so many levels, more snow, a spectacular ending, the death defying blizzard we drove through on the way home, and there were Blackhawk helicopters insted of F-18s for the fly-over.
And the Penguins lost, AGAIN!

Ice Skating at the Eiffel Tower

I need new skates. And a local rink with a mirror ball and Donna Summer on the sound system.