Ridickulous Seems Like A Cool Guy

If you watched The Real Housewives of Atlanta, you know that I referring to the stripper that is so big that he can fellate himself. Is that a word, fellate? Anyway, he can suck his own dick. 


I just love how NeNe acts like she's a lady when she sees him. Puh-lease! You know she only acted disgusted because she didn't think of it first. What a nasty old bitter bitch she has become. I have never seen a glummer cunt.


And since you are all wondering.....Ridickulous naked after the jump! Proceed with caution.

The Went- Wents

Look who finally got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, it's the GoGo's! My, some of them have gotten up there, haven't they? And the cutest one looks the worst! Please tell me that that's a wig Jane Wiedlin is wearing. She looks like she's channeling Sylvia Miles.

She looked like this only a few years ago during her time on The Surreal Life-

Go back to brunette!

Here they are when they were young and still had baby fat in their faces-

What the hell is going on with Belinda's face?  

She looks like Eileen Brennan!

I know, we all get old, but this is depressing. Who's going to turn up wrinkly tomorrow, Webster?

As If You Needed Any More Proof

...that Ohio is NUTS, I mean bananas.

http://www.cleveland.com/strongsville/index.ssf/2011/07/banana_at_large_after_fight_wi.html

Who has a banana as a mascot? This has to be a prank.

Genius Or Retarded- You Tell Me

The only reason I can think of, to use a phone like that, would be extreme paranoia over the possibility of cancer/radiation/tumors/NewtGingrichreadingyourthoughts.

Guess What I Did Today

Here's a hint-

Yeah, I golfed. Don't ask me what I shot because I don't care. It was almost 80 today and that's good enough to convince me that cold weather is gone, though some people only just got the memo.

Seriously, they waited until April to take down their Christmas decorations. Get with it! All the best tacky people already have their giant rabbits in the front yard and trees laden with pastel plastic eggs.

On closer inspection I notice that they have a box of fireworks in the back. Huh? Is that for a Christmas in July party? You know, because we don't get enough Winter weather around here. We like to relive it all year long.

Now I'm going to watch The Masters and pray for Tiger to win. If he does, you can be sure he's back riding the white trash waitresses again. YAY

I almost forgot, Froggy's back! While we were cleaning up the garden this afternoon, we noticed that he crawled out of the pond's intake valve to sun himself on a mossy rock. I bought a little crown for him. I hope he likes it, and when I kiss him he better turn into Prince. PRE- artist formerly known as.

  

Caption The Housewife, The Constipated Smile Edition

Caption Miss Andy At The Glaad Awards

Caption The Housewife, Prune Mouth Edition

Yes, that's Crazy Eyes and Crackie. When their lips met, a magnitude 6.8 earthquake hit Cali. Scientists were baffled when they discovered that only Cota de Caza and the Pinot Grigio supplies had been affected.

Your turn!

The very Definition of Redundant

From Reddit.

Boughetto Is My New Favorite Word

Thank you, Kandi. I love her, and she hit the nail on the head with that word. Bourgeois and Ghetto. Phaedra in a nutshell.


I'm sorry. Did The Queen of Yikes fall face first into the '5 for a dollar' bin at Michaels? And ballerinas at a baby shower? Maybe, and I do mean MAYBE, that would be okay if you were an actual ballerina and were having a girl who might grow up to be one.

And that SMILE.
 I've never had a kid, so I'm just asking. When you are in your tenth trimester, do you start bonding with the baby inside you so heavily, that you actually start to look like a toddler? I half expected some soggy Cheerios to slide out of her mouth, half eaten and drool covered.

And why did the Michelin Man poop in her hair? Surely he has better things to do.

In related news, Mariah Carey finally confirmed that she is pregnant. She's going to make this shower look like lunch at the homeless shelter.

My Mommy Has Issues

To the person that did this- Maybe you should just give in and have an actual child already.

Smoking Baby

Literally.

EMBED-Ardi Rizal - The real SMOKING BABY !! - Watch more free videos

What can I say? I read that this Malaysian 2 year old has a pack a day habit and his parents keep feeding it because daddy is a fucking moron, I mean little Marlboro man pitches a major fit if they don't. Is there no CPS in that country? What's next- internet porn? Some coffee to lubricate his infant throat? This is so beyond abuse that I want to scream, and you may want to scream at me after I say this but I truly believe that idiots should be sterilised so this shit doesn't happen in the first place.

The Easter Bunny Pooped All Over These Poor People's Yard

If you live in the Cleveland area like Mr. McSlore and myself, you picked up your Sunday paper only to see a picture of this lunatic's home on the front page of the Metro section. We had to go to Euclid to see the M-I-L, and I made my baby drive past the house. I believe that the couple's expressions reflect the fact that Napa was barking at them like a maniac, or it could have been because I rolled down the window and yelled, "Get a hobby," in honor of Bethenny Frankel Hoppy.

Seriously, do you know how many rounds of golf I could enjoy for the price of all that sherbet colored crap? And the neighbours must LOVE them. Cars go up and down the street all damn day and then they get out and walk all over everyone's yard. It's a good thing they don't live near us. We have a shotgun in the house, and Mr. Mcslore is always saying how the world is over-populated, if you get my drift.

Did Michael Jackson Rip Off Bob Fosse?

World of Wonder found this video of Bob Fosse playing the Snake in the Grass from what I presume to be a film adaptation of The Little Prince. Your jaw will drop. This I swear. It is unreal and since MJ was a child in a grown up's body, it is safe to presume that he saw this at some point. You have to watch it. Even the short pants and white spats resemble Jackson's outfit in the Billie Jean video. It's uncanny.

Is This A Joke?

Please tell me that this is a joke. A woman in iowa is getting prosecuted for admitting to paramedics that she CONSIDERED abortion. Those prosecutors should be aborted, because that is completely insane.
Link:

http://digitaljournal.com/article/287684#tab=comments&sc=0&contribute=&local=

Where There's A Will, There's A Way

Should A Guy Go To Jail For This?

An older gentlemen left this note on a comment card he found in the seat pocket in front of him on a flight to Maui-
I thought I was going to die, we were so high up, I thought to myself: I hope we don’t crash and burn or worse yet landing in the ocean (?) through it, only to be eaten by sharks, or worse yet end up on some place like Gilligan’s island stranded, or worse yet be eaten by a tribe of headhunters, speaking of headhunters why do they eat outsiders and not the family members? Strange…and what if the plane ripped apart in mid-flight and we plummeted to earth, landed on Gilligan’s Island and then lived through it, and the only woman there was Mrs. Thurston Howell III? No MaryAnne (my favorite), no Ginger – just lovely! If it were just her, I think I’d opt for the sharks, maybe the headhunters.

They are charging him with interfering with the crew, a felony! What the hell? Couldn't they do their jobs through their laughter? I say, give him a mental evaluation, an ascot and a highball and send him on his way back to Sunnydale. Seriously.

Extreme Subaru Driving

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

On A Slightly Less Adorable Note.....

Jammies

I love James Franco so I put in an effort to watch his SNL appearance last night. After three dismal sketches, I quit watching, which means that I missed this-