Real Housewives of Orange County Recap: Cowardly Lyin'

The housewives sure can throw a dinner party, can't they? They eat, chat and respect each other about as well as The Huns respected enemy women. Yes, I just compared the gals to rapist barbarians, and why not? They rape my ears and eyes with their stupidity every damn week!

Caption The Housewife, Mom Jeans Edition

The Bethenny pic wasn't even remotely funny, so here's one of a teen Madriana looking all Menudo's big sister and whatnot. Yikes!

Alabama Famewhoring, Woo Hoo

This woman is insane. She is known for nothing, she makes hideous hats and runs around with her own Asian paparrazi. If Michael K hadn't made a star(?) out of her, James St James would have never spent the day with her. Still, I love that she sleeps with a gun under her pillow and calls Prince von Asshat a bitch. Someone needs to write a movie for her, something a little Shakes the Clown would be awesome. It would be a chronicle of the international supermodels retarded exploits, throw some espionage in there and call it Fire In The Hole.

Housewives Are Back

We had a two week hiatus from the hoes over the holidays but now they are back in all their stomach turning glory. So, what happened on the show? Go read my recap. It's overshadowed by the news that Simon Blarney filed for divorce from Tamra Sue. What a soap opera, only those are better acted.
I read the dee-vorce papers over at Radar and he doesn't have to put down any reasons for splitting since California is a no-fault state, but he does. Hmmmmm. Bitter, much?
I think that he wants to get back at Tamra for leaving him so he cited disloyalty and infidelity with a heaping side helping of verbal abuse. I always wondered what a typical Sunday dinner in Orange County was like. Now I know.
Here's the link to read my latest take on these whores over at TVgasm-

http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/real-housewives-of-orange-county/real-housewives-28-11407.php

One more thing, how much do you want to bet that Tamra is diddling her realtor buddy Marcos? He looks a lot like Simon, only he has money, and they do spend an awful lot of time in empty houses with plenty of bedrooms. Naughtay. I hope he starts texting damaging information to Gretchen. How perfect would that be?

Lil Duval Is A Genius

And if you're a struggling comedian in these cash strapped times you may as well go for the joke instead of wasting your money on meaningless bling.

Plus, it totally put a smile on my face.

What's Wrong With This Picture?

Hints-

No, the lady in the back is not peeing into the potted plant.

Yes, it is very wrong to cheat on your spouse but that's not why this picture is so fucked up.

Keep in mind that this is Fox News. *cough, cough* Sorry, calling it 'news' is a gross exaggeration.

Look at his description.

A little something in parentheses.

Here's your asnswer:

He is NOT a Democrat. Nice try, Fox assholes. Sorry to burst your bubble but Republicans cheat too.

Just a Rant

We have all these teen shows that revolve around rich kids and their pseudo adult lifestyles that may be fun to watch and great escapism, but where is the reality? Real kids with sucky lives whose parents aren't making ends meet, how about the escapism these kids resort to and how it can sometimes turn their lives around? There would still be plenty of drama, how could there not be. Now that is a show I would watch.