You Thought She Was A Moron Before..

Just wait until you watch this.

Okay. Who is going to take one for the team and try this? I would but vodka doesn't last that long in my house.


 JC? Skatt? NO? Let's get a troll to do it. They'll do anything.

Caption The Housewife, Accordion Belly Edition

It kinda looks like a stack of pancakes. Yum, pancakes.

Caption The Housewife, Fog Chow Edition

Talk about the opening of an envelope. Does a paper flap count?

Real housewives of New York City Recap: Barely There

This was a strange episode. There were a couple of hilarious moments, but for the most part none of it propelled the story lines further. It really felt more like a 'lost footage' reel, rather than the real thing. We did get to know Cindy a little better and I wish we hadn't. Geez, what a sad sack BORE. Why is she single again? You know, other than the fact that she looks like Steven Tyler with an unhinged jaw?

Oh, and no Jill! She getting a facelift in Australia because the Zarin hate hasn't reached that continent yet. Poor Bawby. I hope he doesn't get overwhelmed beating back all those fans of hers.

A Very Strange Dynamic

Why are LuLu and Leather having a discussion about friendship? I will hazard a guess. I think that everyone knows that Leather was on something last year and they want, no, they NEED to know she's clean. The Jills and LuLus need her as an ally and part of making her a viable one is convincing us that she's sane. Thoughts?

Caption The Housewife, Beverly Hills Kumquats Edition

Hey, Kyle! Nice underarm labia!

A bonus Kelly tweet for the Bronx cobra that never actually went missing in the first place. Dun DUN.

Caption The Housewife, I'll Wear Anything Edition

Caption The Housewife, She-Ra Edition

Caption The Housewife

Oh dear God, it's Leather in a leather bikini. Where does she stop and where does it begin?