Epic Meal Time For Your New Year's Drunch

It is almost that time again, folks. New Year's Eve- to drink or not to drink? To party with no worries or to party while respecting all those hangover prevention tips that are flooding every damn website right now. I plan on drinking a bottle of wine or two, acting a fool at home with my husband and chowing down on some kind of pork, preferably with bones and fat. The next morning? Who knows. It depends on my hangover level. I may just have to hair of the dog it. Also, I have not gone out on New Years in ages. Why? Because I do not wish to get a DUI or get killed by some asshole who is too cheap to get a hotel room or a cab.


All of that aside, this is just some next level shit. Just don't watch it if you have a stomach ache.

It's Christmas

Hubby in his Wayne Rooney mask. He's my favorite soccer player. NO, WE ARE NOT ROLE PLAYING LATER. Just want to make sure that's clear.


Hope your day is great and no one throws up on the dog. I'm having a pretty good one, albeit a trifle hungover, and we all know the cure for that- more drinking!


Only one week til Mob Wives....Merry Christmas, bitches!

Caption The Housewife, Bleary Eyed and Cross Eyed On The Red Carpet Edition

Smudge!

Gee, I wonder what they were up to that night. It's so weird. Christina Aguilera used to always look so perfect, especially the lipstick. I fear she's headed for her own little post-divorce, apres Disney tween stardom breakdown, and she needs to lose that boyfriend. What does this Mathew Rutler person DO anyway? Does anyone know?

DRUNCH!!!

HaHaHaHilarious!

But... Where Will I Put The Bottle?

My birthday is in August, but I accept Flag Day gifts and Memorial Day stocking stuffers.

Wining And Dining While Pregnant

I took a break today and wandered around the internet where I found this picture of Kate Hudson enjoying a glass of wine in Argentina while pregnant. I've never had kids so I've never had this conversation with an OBGYN, but some of you have taken that leap and I wondered what your thoughts were. My only experience with it was serving a lady in her ninth month and she assured me that her doctor was fine with it. Why not let the baby enter the world with a wee buzz on, you know? Knock out some of the trauma, which in some cases (Rapey Eyes) leaves you scarred for life. 

As long as it isn't Kitty Dukakis style drinking and you aren't reliving The Lost Weekend, I'm pretty sure your kid isn't going to come out missing half a spinal chord or with the brain power of a Tamra.

TGIF With Ray Gettin' Gibbled And Catchin' Sum Air!

LOLOLOL! I would like to thank Chemgal's neighbours for being such good sports!

BaR2D2

Some geek built this in his garage in eight months. Freaking AWESOME.

EMBED-BaR2D2 robotic bar celebrates St. Patricks Day - Watch more free videos

Happy St. Patrick's Day From The Dropkick Murphys

And my favorite Dropkick song, 'Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced.'

I Wish You All A Good Weekend

What will YOU be doing? I will be staving off the cold and wondering why people can't drive in snow. Especially since it's almost Spring. Shouldn't you have gotten over the fear of slush back in December, Mr. Retard that almost killed me today? I'd move, but I doubt that I'd ever find a city that's more in tune with my aesthetic. Just look at the painting above. It's from the Slore wing of the Cleveland Museum of Art.

I'm drunk already. GO ME!

Is Stretch A Drunk?

You tell me..

By the way, just watch the first 5 minutes.

Look What I Found!

St. Louis has this awesome store called Lukas Liquors. I walked through the door, found an aisle that was wall-to-wall Zinfandel, and laid out my sleeping bag. Just as I was taking the wine key out of my bag, I looked up and what did I see? Why, 'tis Bethenny Frankel, staring down at me! I regret to inform you that nary a bottle was missing from the display. Sadly, being a skinny girl isn't high on the list of things to do around  here. Not that the people are fat, they are just more salt of the earth and less trendy. Plus, alcohol content higher than 7% might be nice too. Seriously, who drinks Margaritas with less alcohol than Christmas Ale? NOBODY. Well, except the McSlore pre-schoolers. We don't start them on the hard stuff until they can read and write. It's a law or something.

What are YOU drinking? 

Office Party- Sober or Drunk?

Quite a conundrum for a gal like me.

Worst Break-Up

I am taking Sheesh's advice and starting a new thread for you crazies and all your insane exploits. I had no idea that the readers of this blog were a bunch of alcoholic outlaws. I thought that I was the only one! (((group hug)))


So, share your break-up and 'men are horrible' stories, and no, this is not a contest. I can't be giving away ALL my toiletries. Stanky ass janksters don't get the good joorey, as we all know.


As usual, I will start. This was a long time ago when I was a barely legal Twunt. 
I was 18 and dating a guy we'll call Asshole. He was from a fraternity that was loaded with future firemen and outdoors-y guys with inscrutable majors. It was fun, he was cute, but nothing serious. 

Audrina's Mommy Is Articulate

I don't watch Dancing With The FameWhores, but I did watch The Hills before Lauren left. Audrina is a dope. She doesn't have enough brain energy to power a keychain flashlight. How did she get that way? I'm going with fetal alcohol syndrome. Judge for yourself with her Mother's charming little rant before someone makes a call and it gets pulled down.

Good Riddance Tom Sizemore

I'm a busy little recapper at the moment. Celebrity Rehab got posted yesterday and I am so glad that Tom walked out. I hope that he stays gone because I find it absolutley reprehensible to allow him to get paid to be in rehab WITH THE WOMAN HE BEAT UP. Wrong on every level, especially since I love Heidi Fleiss and she deserves a chance at sobriety without having to look at his ugly mug every damn day.
Kari Anne is back and I am calling her Carrion for obvious reasons. What a waste of space. She is truly vile and needs to disappear. I'll help her. I hear that the White Slavery racket can be super fun for former beauty queens these days. Maybe I could arrange a little meet & greet.
Linkypoo-

http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/celebrity-rehab/celebrity-rehab-5-11669.php

Bad, Drunk Santa

This is for Mr. McSlore who spent all day Thursday trying to find this movie, to no avail. It figures. We should have bought it years ago, really.
Leave it to the WOW report to dig up this gem. I love the midget. Everything is better with little people and Tony Cox's side eye is unmatched in any realm of popular culture.

0+0= Fag

I watched the trailer for the new Kids in the Hall movie and it kinda sucked. It's almost as if they did the movie just because they needed the money. I was so excited too! Maybe they're saving the good stuff for when people actually go see it? Nah, doubt it.
David Foley isn't in it either. Not a good sign.
So, here's the drunk daddy sketch instead.

I've Been There

28 Drinks Later - watch more funny videos

But now I limit myself to 27. It's called maturity.