Poo Can Cure You

There's an article on msnbc.com about curing digestive tract diseases like C.diff infections by putting a tube down the patient's nose that has fecal matter from another person with healthy bacteria in their bowel movements. The poo makes its way through the digestive system and infuses the sick intestines with healthy butt mud and voila! 85% of people who have gotten this done were cured.

Can you imagine the first person that they tried this on? You're going to put what down my what?? How do you not hurl? And hurl spectacularly. And the scats rejoice...

Santa Babies

Your daily cuteness!

Creepy Old Man Magnet

I can't remember when it started but I've always seemed to be the perfect type for leering older men. I could be in Antarctica studying penguin mating habits and some weird old professor would probably track me down and make my life miserable.

Anyway, I'm standing in our local upscale grocery's check out line when I notice that behind me there's some dude 20 years older than god giving me this really wide pervy smile. He's fit, he's wearing jeans and a sweater probably designed to make him appear hip with the younger cats out there, but still obviously an older douchebag.

So he leans into me with that Polident toothiness and whispers, "I really like your hair."

I say thanks and for a moment contemplate leaving it at that but he continues to eye me like a complete fruitcake so I grab a few strands and I say, "You know, it's getting pretty long, doncha think?" Then I look him right in the eye, lean in and whisper, "And they say all lesbians have short hair, hee hee."

He backed away immediately.

The Culkin Clan Just Got Smaller

How weird. Macauley's 29 year old sister Dakota stepped off a curb in Los Angeles and right into the path of a moving car yesterday afternoon. I wonder if she was wearing an ipod. The kids in my neighborhood almost get hit by cars every day because they're lost in their own little ipod world. She died of massive head wounds and the driver that hit her wasn't under the influence. Sad.

I Could Spend Hours in Here

So I'm off to Big Fun in Coventry Village to shop for Christmas. They have tons of antique toys and novelty stuff like boob shaped glasses and gag Dubya dolls. If the store owner has found a Bugs Bunny in drag figurine I WILL DIE!!

Wish me luck!

Hits of the Week

Pittsburgh is in there 3 times and the number one hit by Brooks Orpik is unbeleivably not fatal. Spezza just gets right up and smiles. I think he was still woozy or maybe INSANE. He did score a hat trick that night. I hate their jerseys, though. They are all kinds of super ugly and not creative at all, like someone designed them using graphics software from the nineties.

Golden Globe Nominations Announced

No real surprises here but it is kind of strange that both Brad and Angelina Jolie are nominated. What if angie wins and Brad doesn't? Or the other way around? Will she cut off his other ball?

http://www.goldenglobes.org/news/id/104

Celine, Your Dress is too Short

But at least you wear panties.

Christies Is Recession-Proof

I don't want to turn this into an auction blog but when a diamond sells for $24.3 million, I simply must post a picture of it.

This is the Wittelsbach rare blue diamond. It is 35.56 carats and was sold at auction house Christies to diamond dealer Laurence Graff. Once upon a time it belonged to the Infanta Margarita Teresa who received it from her father King Philip IV of Spain on her wedding day.

Elizabeth Taylor is in her wheelchair drooling right now. And for once it's not because of her medication.

Sports Quickies

Carmelo Anthony tied a 30 year old record by scoring 33 points in one quarter, The Cavs win their 10th in a row 101-93 over the Sixers, C.C. Sabathia will be a Yankee next year for a reported $161 million over 7 years, the Heisman finalists are Sam Bradford, Colt McCoy and Tim Tebow, and the Pens still keep stinking up the ice.

And here are Lebron's seven dunks against the Raptors.

It Truly is the Year of the Dog

From the puppy cam to the puppy who saved his friend on the highway to the 3 year old saved by the family pets, it has been a heartwarming year of doggy-do-gooding. All hail our canine friends!

Are Auctions Becoming a Sign of the Times?

It's no secret that Michael Jackson has financial (I almost wrote facial, ha!) problems, but I have to wonder what, if anything, he's going to have left after this? He is auctioning off everything from the artwork he has bought to the famous white Thriller glove. I am assuming that this is a desperation move because this guy is all about acquiring and holding on to things as long as possible. And talk about bad timing! We're in a recession, obviously, and most people believe that he's a pedophile, and who wants a pervert's belongings?

We'll see how much he raises in the Spring when it all goes down. There are probably still some crazy super fans left. Hopefully they have deep pockets.

http://www.juliensauctions.com/auctions/2009/michael-jackson/index.html

Don't Eat Shark Fin Soup!

Who could have guessed that we'd be on the brink of the extinction of certain species of sharks?! Well, that is exactly what is happening because of the exploding Chinese economy and it's burgeoning middle class.

Don't forget, the shark has been on this planet for millions of years, they roamed the oceans before Dinosaurs walked the earth and the ecosystem of our oceans depend upon this predator to stay in balance. So why were 100 million of them killed in the last year alone? For $500 a pound, that's why.

It's a win-win for the fisherman because all they need is the fin so they just throw the rest of the shark carcass overboard plus they are making a killing because the soup that is made from the fin is considered a delicacy that more and more Chinese can afford.

Do you know how many of us humans get killed by sharks every year? 10. Maybe they should start killing more people. Chinese people.

Another Fabulous Auction

Christies in Paris will be holding an auction in February of the belongings Yves Saint Laurent amassed in his storied career as one of the world's top fashion designers. This is going to be massive. Just look at the room above. Pierre Berge is about to become a very rich man or should I say, an even richer one?

Here's the Vanity Fair article with more pictures: http://www.vanityfair.com/magazine/2009/01/ysl_auction200901

Princess Leia on the Today Show

Another great gift idea, Carrie Fisher's new book!